
Good Parenting and Estate Planning Work Together
Wealth created by one generation is often lost by the third generation when financial discipline, respect for the process of wealth creation and understanding the responsibilities of wealth aren’t taught from generation to generation. There are ways that parents can help their children and grandchildren overcome this tendency, and estate planning strategies are part of the process, says a recent article from Barron’s, “Teach Your Kids to Preserve Family Wealth, Not Squander It.”
Preparing to transfer wealth is best done with an experienced estate planning attorney. In addition, an annual letter to your children with a summary of the family’s financial situation and a statement of the parent’s values will help educate and update the family.
The annual letter should also share info about where to find wills and trusts and other estate planning documents, contact info for the estate planning attorney, financial advisor and accountant, and the location of life insurance policies. Don’t neglect an inventory of digital assets, their value and how to access them.
Trusts offer an opportunity to express values by creating a trust with incentive provisions and age-related triggers. When a beneficiary reaches certain milestones, like graduating from college or getting married, distributions can be made. There are also means of discouraging problematic behaviors. Provisions may be written to delay distributions until a beneficiary retains a job or enters a rehabilitation program and maintains sobriety for a certain period. Your estate planning attorney will discuss which type of trust is best for your family.
Start by defining your own family’s values and what it looks like to put those values into real-life scenarios. For instance, if you value entrepreneurial spirit, a trust could be created with discretionary distributions and non-binding language encouraging heirs to use the funds to start or expand a business. A trust could also encourage children to buy a home in a community with an excellent school district to benefit their children.
Stating these models without living them defeats the end goal. Children learn values by seeing how their parents behave. These lessons are learned early in life.
For high-net-worth families, avoiding a sense of entitlement is a major challenge. This is where generations lose a work ethic and wealth. Good parenting can avoid this by encouraging children to become resilient and allowing them to fail in safe settings. Developing confidence based on their abilities, whether in academics, sports, or community efforts, will foster a sense of self and independence not based on the family’s wealth.
For regular families intent on building wealth over generations, a healthy respect for the work it takes to build bank accounts, buy a home and create the stability needed for the future takes extra effort. Creating an estate plan with an experienced estate planning attorney can help you plan for the unexpected.
Reference: Barron’s (Feb. 7, 2025) “Teach Your Kids to Preserve Family Wealth, Not Squander It”